Five Fingers Down Your Throat
by LizzyLovesPink
Summary: Aizen has a new plan to immobilize the Soul Reapers: make them uncontrollably puke so he can unleash a horde of Hollows onto the Gotei 13 and be met with no resistance! He picks Szayelaporro to do the honors of giving one of the Soul Reaper captains a serum that'll trigger the vomiting. With Szayelaporro dressing in drag and Kenpachi as his target, what could possibly go right?


**WARNING: This fic contains multiple graphic scenes of vomiting. This has the potential to offend some readers, so please use discretion!**

It was a nice, peaceful day in Hueco Mundo, or at least, as peaceful as it possibly could be, being filled with the tormented souls of unhappy spirits.

And on this particular day, sitting upon his throne in Las Noches, Sosuke Aizen was formulating a plan to immobilize the pitifully annoying Shinigami to a point where he could unleash a horde of Hollows onto Soul Society, and be met with virtually no resistance.

Then, he had it-the most perfect plan. While it was not the plan to end all plans, nor was it even his master plan, it was still guaranteed to succeed.

Yes, this would succeed for sure! Not wanting to waste any time with the details, he called for his trusty mad scientist, the 8th Espada, and asked for him to be brought to the throne room.

A few minutes later, Szayelaporro entered, taking a knee once he approached the front of the throne. "You asked for me, Master Aizen?" He asked.

"Yes. I have a use for you." Sosuke put simply, leaning back.

"And what would that possibly be?" Szayelapporro asked eagerly, barely able to contain his excitement. To think, he'd finally be useful to his Master!

"I want to launch an attack on the Gotei 13 today using a horde of Hollows, but knowing those Soul Reapers, they'll be armed to the bones and prepared for any attack I unleash onto them. However, I have a plan to render them useless and unable to fight, and I need your utmost participation in order for this to work. I need you to create a potion or serum of some sort to make as many Soul Reapers as physically possible ill to the point of unconsciousness, then sneak into the Soul Society to administer the serum. Once you are done, give me a signal and I will attack the city. If you fail, however, you will be duly punished. Do you think you can do this, Number 8?" Sosuke asked calmly, glaring down at Szayelaporro, who simply grinned.

"Illness? Sounds like my specialty! I will have them keeling over in the streets in no time!" He promised, then turned to leave.

"Do not, under any circumstances, kill any of them. That is my task. Do whatever is required of this task, but leave death out of it." Came Sosuke's final warning, which the 8th Espada nodded at and left. He could carry out his mission without killing anybody, no problem!

Several hours later, and also several chemical explosions later, Szayelaporro had created a vial filled with an orange, vicious fluid that slowly churned back and forth. It was a specialty of his, one he had plans for and had wanted to create for a while now, but never had a chance to.

The vial's liquid represented bile, and if drunken by someone with a high spiritual energy, would cause an overproduction of bile in both that person and anybody close enough to be affected by their spiritual energy that would eventually lead to violent bouts of vomiting. They'd remain sick as long as the potion remained in the person's system, which was only a day, but that was more than enough time for Sosuke's plan to be carried out.

However, there still remained the question of how he was to give this to a Soul Reaper. He couldn't very well just walk in, and the Gotei 13 wouldn't just let a random stranger in, no matter how good his disguise was.

No, he needed to disguise himself as one of them. Someone so innocent and trustworthy, nobody would ever suspect them of foul-play. But who?

As he sat at his desk thinking, he was alerted to the sound of his lab door being opened and closed, then footsteps sounding loudly until they stopped beside him.

"What are you working on?" Asked the hissing voice of the 9th Espada, Aaronireo.

"I have to think of a good Soul Reaper to dress up as so I can infiltrate the Soul Society and make everyone sick so Master Aizen can attack them." Szayelaporro answered in a rush. "The methods to disguise myself would not be hard at all-just a combination of my cloning power with your absorption powers. But the question is, who to go as?"

He glanced over at the tall Espada, who was currently wearing his mask, as usual. "Well, Lord Gin and I have been observing potential targets in the Soul Society for quite some time now with several hidden cameras. If you'd like, you can view the footage we've gathered and make your selection." He offered, and the 8th Espada jumped up.

"Perfect! The world shall be mine, then!" He laughed as Aaronireo led him to his quarters.

The Espada's rooms were all on either side of a hallway, going in order from 1 to 10. Therefore, it was a hop, jump, and skip away to the 9th Espada's bedroom, which was surprisingly roomy. It was also extremely dark, so Szayelaporro kept his eyes glued to his feet, nervous of tripping over something and falling.

"Here are the tapes." Aaronireo stated, walking over to a projector and pulling out several strips of film. Szayelaporro sat down on a violet bean-bag and told the lower-ranking Espada to proceed, which he did by feeding one strip into the projector and turning the dusty thing on. "Tell me when you want me to stop." He pressed a button on a black remote and a film started playing, or mainly one scene from what looked like a longer movie.

The scene was grainy, but in color, and showed a simple scene of Toshiro and Momo laying on the floor in Toshiro's office, reading books together. It only lasted for several seconds before cutting to a second scene of Rangiku sitting at a vanity, brushing her hair gently. Szayelaporro's interest perked up at her, and he quickly memorized her face so he could go back and study her in greater detail later.

The third scene didn't take place in the Soul Society, but rather on Earth, and showed a certain black-haired Soul Reaper eating O-shaped cereal bits out of a red bowl. Despite nothing else going on, the camera focused on her eating for a solid two minutes, the scene ending with her cleaning her bowl and putting the cereal, milk, and bowl up. Afterwards, she left the room, and the camera didn't follow her, cutting away into the next scene.

Szayelaporro looked at Aaronireo briefly afterwards, wondering why she had more screen-time than anybody else shown so far, and Aaronireo returned the look.

"She was of particular importance to me," He responded simply.

They both turned their attention back to the screen, which was now showing a little pink-haired girl running into Squad 4 happily and loudly asking for candy. The presumed captain of that Squad smiled and gave the little girl a large clay pot filled with multicolored lollipops, to which the girl smiled and ran out, yelling about her prize.

"Her." Szayelaporro stated, making Aaronireo pause the scene. "She will be my disguise. Such an innocent little girl...who could possibly suspect her of wrong-doing?" He stood up. "Yes, she will be my ticket inside."

"Really?" If Aaronireo had a nose, he would've wrinkled it. "Well, it's your choice."

"Now come, we have lots of tests to do if I'm going to gain your absorption powers temporarily." Szayelaporro offered his arm to Aaronireo, who simply walked past him back to the pink-haired Espada's lab. Szayelaporro shrugged and followed, rubbing his hands together at the thought of experimenting on something again.  
############

Meanwhile, in the Soul Society, and more specifically, the Gotei 13, everything was well, despite also being full of dead people. Rukia had managed to get a break away from Earth to come visit her brother, who had arranged a fancy dinner for her. However, since it was Byakuya, he was very vague on the actual details, merely telling her the name of the restaurant and to 'wear something appropriate'. Well, that could've meant anything! She didn't know the style or ambiance of the place he chose, so she figured she'd have to go with her gut.

Of course, once she actually arrived, the other female Shinigami had already heard of her dinner and took it upon themselves to find her the perfect dress-whether she wanted them to or not.

The group had taken her to the only luxurious boutique in all of Soul Society, nestled near the center of the very questionable entertainment district. Once they got there, they all started browsing for dresses that matched their personal tastes more than Rukia's.

"How about this?" Rangiku offered, holding out a low-cut black evening gown made from silk. The slit was cut up nearly to the waist, and came with a matching white lace garter.

"It's a family dinner, not a cocktail party!" Momo scolded. "Here, try this!" She smiled and offered her a light blue dress that went down to her ankles and was sleeveless.

"Seems a bit drafty," Rukia noticed.

"No, no, try this one!" Yachiru demanded, throwing one at her. Rukia caught it and unfolded it, finding it to a be a bright bubblegum pink lolita dress with a matching frilly hair bow, knee-high pink boots, pink lacy kneesocks, the works.

"Too excessive! She wouldn't be able to walk in that thing!" Rangiku scolded.

"But it's cute!~" She pouted, taking it back and simply dropping it on the floor.

"Try this one on," Nanao directed, handing it over to Rukia, who nodded and stepped into a dressing room, putting it on quickly and stepping back out to show it off.

It was a very light evening dress that just barely scraped her knees and threatened to flip up at any second, and was a bright shade of scarlet. It was also sleeveless, but made up for it by coming with elbow-long opera gloves and a lacy black choker. Red flats finished her look. In everyone's excitement, however, they all neglected to see if it held a sheath for Rukia's zanpakuto. It did not.

"Oh, you look so pretty!" Rangiku gushed.

"It's not pink though," Yachiru continued to pout, leaving the store shortly after that, the dress she dropped still laying on the floor.

"Tell us all about the dinner, alright?" Momo asked, and Rukia nodded.

"I should hurry over there before Big Brother thinks I bailed on him!" Rukia stated, running off, a bit clumsily in her flats. From the name alone, Rukia knew it wasn't very far from the boutique, and instantly worried she was too overly-dressed for a seedy place. Once she reached the restaurant, however, she found it to be one of the fancier ones, the ones that costed money simply for looking at. Strange how it was built there, of all places.

She carefully walked inside and quickly found Byakuya and curtsied to him. "Hello!" She smiled politely.

"Your dress is appropriate for the occasion." He commented, leading her further inside.

"Oh, you really think so? Nanao-san picked it out for me!" Rukia blushed slightly. "Let's go sit over by the window!" She lightly pulled his arm over in that direction and sat down at a white-dressed table with a fancy candle-set on top. The window stretched from ceiling to the floor, and allowed a very nice view of all the different shoppers walking around.

Once they sat down, Rukia flipped open her menu and started reading it. "What do you think I should get?"

########

After Yachiru left the store, she wandered around the city for a bit, not having anything else to do. It was lunch-time, but she didn't feel very hungry yet, so she neglected eating lunch with her squad. Besides, it wasn't like she was never around, and if they missed her, she wasn't _that_ hard to find.

Szayelaporro took this moment to present himself to the little girl, already dressed as her.

"Who are you?" She instantly demanded, visibly concerned.

"Honey, don't worry yourself over such a trivial thing! I'm here to please my Master!" He answered, laughing. "But don't worry, I won't hurt anybody!"

Before Yachiru could continue to protest, Szayelaporro pulled out a ball-gag and shoved it onto her, pouting slightly. "It doesn't look as cute on you as I thought it would!" He whined in Yachiru's voice. He then pulled out some ropes and tightly bound both her arms and legs, rendering her incapable of escape.

He dragged her along, soon finding a slightly-opened janitor's closet and throwing her inside, slamming the door shut and locking it.

Now that he was in, he had to think of a way to poison Yachiru's captain. He stood there in front of the door just thinking, wondering the best way to go about it. The most obvious way of ingesting the potion was of eating or drinking it, but he wasn't sure when eating hours for Soul Reapers were held, and if he missed them or not. Hell, he didn't even know if Soul Reapers ate or not! Most of the other Arrancar insisted Soul Reapers were too pure to eat, which he had to agree with.

However, his solution came to him in the form of a scantily-clad stoic woman carrying a tray full of luncheon items. And boy, was _she_ scantily-clad. She was wearing the regular black robe of a Shinigami, but it barely covered her thighs and wore a red choker and white gloves with it. Clearly, she was friends with a very perverted fashionista.

"Your captain missed lunch again." She said calmly, bending down to give him the tray. Damn, that skirt was _so_ short. He suddenly found himself wishing he could've been standing behind her, just to see if what Nnoitra always said was true: that Shinigami girls never wore panties! "Could you please bring that to him? He is in his office, as usual." Her voice brought him out of his thoughts, and he took the tray from her.

"Of course! Kenny will be so happy!" He beamed, and the woman's eyes brightened, but her mouth remained the same. "Thank you for letting me know!"

"And I also bought those pink diamond-encrusted barf buckets both you and Rangiku-san requested for our next meeting." She reminded him before leaving. Barf buckets, hm? What perfect timing.

Despite what was a heavy tray in a little girl's hands, Szayelaporro found himself handling the tray with great ease, and after tapping into the limited surplus of memories Aaronireo had given him, he recalled the location of Squad 11 and skipped over there happily, soon walking inside.

"Good afternoon!" He greeted cheerfully as soon as he walked in, but most people ignored that. Only one person came up to him and bent over at the waist to address him; it was an incredibly effeminate man.

"Is that the food for Captain Kenpachi?" He asked him nicely, and Szayelaporro nodded rapidly.

"I was told he missed it, so here I am bringing it!" He smiled widely.

"Be careful, alright? I feel a strong negative energy about..." The man warned, looking around.

"A Hollow? Here? That's silly, Feather-Head!" He laughed and ran off, ignoring the man's confused glare that followed him.

Szayelaporro tapped into Yachiru's memories once more and found out that man was named Yumichika, and that he himself was currently standing in front of Yachiru's captain's office.

"Kenny! I brought food!" He announced his entry, pushing open the door and setting the tray down on his desk.

To his surprise, nobody was in there, which he considered to be a magnificent stroke of luck. Without wasting another second, he pulled out the vial he hid in his sleeve and added a few drops to both the food and the drink, wanting to be through.

As soon as he slipped the vial back into his sleeve, an extremely-muscular man burst through the doorway and grinned at him, he correctly assumed this must be everybody's captain.

"Kenny!" He held out his arms to be held, and Zaraki scooped up Szayelaporro and placed him on his shoulder, then sat down and begun eating.

"I heard there might be a Hollow lurking about!" He continued to speak in a cheerful voice.

"I sure hope so, we haven't seen some good action for a while, have we?" Zaraki laughed.

"Nope!" Szayelaporro laughed with him and watched him eat his food at a rapid pace. He tried to figure out if he recognized anything, but eventually came to the conclusion that Shinigami and Arrancar must be on totally different diets. Fine by him.

Every so often Zaraki would offer him a piece of his food, which he would politely turn down, much to the captain's surprise. "You love roasted chicken!"

"I'm just not hungry today, Kenny!" Szayelaporro giggled cutely, technically not lying. His own stomach was full still from the brunch he had back at Las Noches before leaving, and didn't the little girl mention something about not being hungry herself?

Soon Zaraki finished eating and stood up and ran over to a training room, still having Szayelaporro clinging to his shoulder. He knew it was only a few minutes before the potion started to take action, and he did not want to be anywhere near this man when it did. He himself would not be affected by it, since he created it, and he knew that the sight of only one Shinigami in the entire city _not_ puking their brains out would cause instant suspicion. Best he got out now.

He could already tell he picked a captain with huge spiritual pressure, which he couldn't control. The second the potion kicked in, it would affect every single Soul Reaper in the Gotei 13, potentially drowning the place in vomit. What fun!

"I'm going for a walk, Kenny!" He announced, jumping off Zaraki's back and landing perfectly on his feet. Before Zaraki could respond, Szayelaporro was already gone, running through the halls of Squad 11, giggling.

Apparently this girl had a reputation, since most Soul Reapers either ignored her or briefly waved when they saw her in this squad. Only one didn't, and he was waiting for her at the end of the hall.

"Lieutenant!" The man greeted, and Szayelaporro racked his brains for the name. Oh, yeah. Yumichika. "The Shinigami Womens' Association meeting is starting, and if we don't hurry, we'll be late! How will their President explain being late?"

"Hey-!" Szayelaporro gasped in surprise when Yumichika picked him up and ran with him outside, but once they left the Squad, his pace quickly slowed.

"Beautiful day out today, huh?" Yumichika asked nicely, putting him down.

"Sure is!" The disguised Espada agreed with a smile.

Before they could take any further steps, they were both nearly knocked down by the ground shaking due to a high spiritual pressure, and Yumichika suddenly clutched his stomach.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"Ugh...I'm fine..." Yumichika insisted, covering up his mouth with both hands.

Szayelaporro felt a small grin creep onto his face once he realized what was happening, and ran away to gather footage for Master Aizen so he could see what a wonderful job he was doing.

His first stop was at a fancy restaurant, where several people were fleeing from despite there not being any signs of something to flee from. He peeked into the window out of curiosity and saw the black-haired Shinigami Aaronireo was so taken with sitting at a nicely-dressed white table with another man, eating white rice with chopsticks. The rice was drowning in soy sauce, and there was a crystal glass filled to the brim with red wine that also looked untouched.

Suddenly, she threw down her chopsticks and stood up, slamming her hands down on the table. "I...chamber pot!" She managed to croak out before hurling the undigested rice and soy sauce all over the spotless table cloth. On and on the stream seemed to flow from her mouth, and when she caught a break, she coughed hard before repeating the feat onto her scarlet evening dress. "Big Brother!" She managed to choke out once she finally got a break. "Water!" She coughed heavily and clutched her throat.

If her brother had a response to that, Szayelaporro didn't catch it, as he was already climbing up the restaurant's gutter to reach a camera that had been casually peeking in, spying on the two eat. Once he climbed to the top, he pushed a button on the black camera and was rewarded with freshly-made film that popped out of a bottom compartment. He climbed back down and slipped the film into his sleeve, then moved onto a new target: the big-busted blonde he saw in the projector's film earlier.

She was wearing regular black Shinigami robes, but she was bent over a street gutter, emptying her stomach violently into it. Her barf was a bright pink. Upon seeing Szayelaporro in his disguise, she looked up and wiped her mouth off, then tried to walk, only to stumble.

"Yachiru-chan! Can you please cancel today's meeting? I'm too sick to go!" She asked, her massive breasts bouncing despite her lack of movement. It'd be fun to just bury his head in there and slap them around a bit...maybe even tie her up and see if the sheer size of her chest would be enough to break even the strongest rope he had. Yes, he'd get super-strong and tight rope, and just tie it tighter and tighter around her chest. Something was bound to break eventually. It was just science. "Yachiru-chan!" She said louder, breaking Szayelaporro's erotic vision of her. He smiled in response and hid his hands behind his back.

"Huh? Oh, of course! Sorry you're sick!" He grinned.

"I knew you'd understand!" The woman instantly went back to puking inside the gutter, and Szayelaporro went on his way as well, looking for more sick Shinigami.

As he looked, he heard the dainty sounds of someone softly retching beside him, and looked to his right to see quite a peculiar sight indeed: a girl with silky black hair pulled into a bun, laying on her stomach and holding an unsheathed zanpakuto in her hand, puking yellowish-green sludge into a river.

Out of curiosity, he approached her, but kept a distance since he didn't want her to get startled and lash out. After all, she had her sword out.

Momo puked for a few more minutes, then pulled herself onto her knees and wiped her mouth off. "Oh, Tobiume, what shall I do? I puked into the Soul Society's drinking water!" She lamented, looking around guiltily. She stuck her zanpakuto inside the puke, making it swirl around, attempting to scoop it up and out of the water.

She didn't get very far, however, before she was assaulted by another vomit attack and started the process all over again, dropping her sword on the ground beside her.

Szayelaporro continued walking, finding himself in front of another squad before long. This one proudly boasted that it was Squad 9, which sounded familar to him but he couldn't place why. He looked inside the window and found a group of Shinigami all busy at work writing, making delicate strokes on paper rapidly. Overseeing their work was a punkish-looking man with spiky black hair.

"Let's work harder! Let's give Soul Society their best magazine issue yet! Keep at it!" He encouraged brightly.

As everyone worked, however, Shuuhei suddenly felt his stomach churn violently and he made for the bookshelf, pulling out a heavy textbook and opening it to a random page in the middle. He upchucked green bile into the book, then quickly shutting it and putting it back. He wiped his mouth off and with another cough, cleared his throat enough to encourage his writers more. "Don't worry about making it perfect, just make it interesting!"

Szayelaporro laughed manically and pulled that footage too, then walked a bit further to another squad close to Yachiru's.

He peeked in a random window in this squad and found himself looking inside some sort of kitchen/chemistry lab hybrid that combined the messes of both into one. Also inside was the scantily-clad woman from earlier and a girly-looking boy with extremely messy brown hair. They were both taking turns stirring and adding ingredients to a blue glass bowl filled with tan-colored cake batter.

"Did you hear that a bunch of Soul Reapers have been keeling over puking?" Rin asked in amazement.

"No, should I?" Nemu responded calmly, cracking three eggs at once into the bowl.

"I wonder why? Bad food, maybe?" Rin continued, sampling his batter by licking the spoon.

"If so, it will not affect me." Nemu handed him a whisk.

Before he could whip it, he suddenly turned a pale shade of green and vomited runny barf into the batter that was suspiciously the same tan color.

"You ate the bad food," Nemu assumed.

"Whatever, nobody will be able to taste this once it's baked!" Rin said cheerfully, whipping the batter up extremely fast and hard with his whisk.

After that scene, Szayelaporro assumed he had more than enough footage to show Sosuke, so he hurried back to Yachiru's captain's office and pulled out a communicator, glad her captain was gone and the room was dark so he wouldn't be disturbed.

He turned the communicator on and found an image of Sosuke calmly sipping his tea. "What is it, Number 8?" He asked, not looking up.

"I just wanted to show you all of the footage I collected today, Master Aizen! They are ready for your Hollow attack!" Szayelaporro grinned and showed him the scenes of various Shinigami helplessly hurling their guts out into anything they had on hand.

"They are all disgusting and pitiful, aren't they? I cannot wait to finish them all off." Sosuke commented with a smile. "Look at how they vomit, without a care for who or what they do it in-or on."

"I did good, didn't I?" Szayelaporro asked eagerly, and Sosuke nodded.

"My Hollows have been sent and are on their way currently. They shall arrive in just a few minutes." With that, Sosuke cut their communication off, and Szayelaporro held it to his heart, already daydreaming of being promoted to a higher rank. Oh, which Espada did he hate the most? He hoped he'd be promoted to Number 5, just to see the look on Nnoitra's face when he snatched his position from him. Or even Number 6...he knew he wouldn't get much higher than 5, since like it or not, the top 4 would forever remain that way. Unless, of course, they disobeyed Master Aizen's orders, but what were the chances of _that_ ever happening?

As he sat there thinking, someone suddenly threw open the door to the dark office, flooding it with bright light. In a panic, Szayelaporro hid the communicator in his sleeve and whirled around to find an extremely exhausted Yumichika standing there, leaning against the door-frame. "Lieutenant? Who were you talking to?" He asked in a slightly-threatening tone, stepping into the room.

Several strands of his hair were plastered to his pale face, and the front of his robes were coated in white, chunky throw-up.

"Myself! You're so silly, Feather-Head!" Szayelaporro giggled cutely.

"Hm. If you're really my Lieutenant, then answer me this. What is my most embarrassing moment?" He grinned weakly.

Shit. How was he supposed to answer that? He racked Yachiru's brains urgently, coming across a fuzzy memory of the Shinigami Women's Association at a party. And there was unlimited sake refills there...

"When you got super drunk at that one party and ripped Rangiku-chan's little black dress because you were climbing a tree thinking it was Mt. Fuji." He smirked, but his face fell when Yumichika reached for his zanpakuto.

"Not even close. There's only one person here who knows my most embarrassing moment, but it's not you." Yumichika started advancing towards him. "Who are you, and where is Yachiru-chan?"

"What makes you think I'll tell you?" Szayelaporro jumped onto Yumichika's head, shocking him, then ran out of the room, running all the way to the Soul Society's river. It wasn't very far, so he got there quite quickly. Now all he needed to do was wait until the Hollows arrived, then he could safely leave.

He soon quickly regretted picking the river, however, since the smell was absolutely rancid. He resisted the urge to cover his nose, since he was a scientist who should be used to foul smells, but judging by the raw smell emitting from it, he knew these Shinigami were dumping far more than just a few candy wrappers and failed science experiments into it. And they say the Arrancar were filthy!

"Yachiru-chan!" A female voice greeted him, and he turned to see it was the Japanese girl with a bun in her hair. She was cute, but had virtually nothing in terms of assets. However, the right outfit _could_ work wonders, and he suddenly got assaulted with the image of this girl in a naughty schoolgirl outfit. Right outfit, indeed. "What's going on? Everybody is sick!" She said in a worried tone.

"Bad food?" He offered before the sky literally opened up to reveal nearly a hundred Hollows pouring out, starting their attack on the Gotei 13. Most were hovering around, waiting to see who had the highest spiritual pressure and therefore be the tastiest, but a few less experienced ones were heading straight for the kill, eating and attacking any Soul Reapers they happened upon.

"What bad timing!" The girl cried before doubling over and hurling up sticky green bile. She went at it for quite a while, and once she finished, she pulled out her sword. "Come on, let's go fight!" She ran off, forgetting there was vomit coating her mouth still.

Most of the Shinigami, however, decided they were simply too ill to fight and were currently running away from the Hollows as fast as they could, ignoring their ever-growing need to make a sidewalk pizza.

"Bad timing? Seems like perfect timing to me!" Szayelaporro started to laugh, delighted at how easy this all was. He suddenly wished he was back in his old body so he could unleash his final form and create even more mayhem on the worthless Soul Reapers, but that had to wait until his job here was finished.

With nothing else to do, he started to run back to Squad 11, meaning to keep tabs on that Yumichika guy before he ended up uncovering way more than he was supposed to.

#######

Meanwhile, Yumichika was carefully scouring the grounds for his lieutenant, ignoring his strongly-churning stomach. He had no idea what its cause was, but the further away he got from his captain, the better he felt, so he figured his captain was the cause of all the puking.

Nevertheless, Zaraki's spiritual pressure was strong, strong enough to suffocate the whole Soul Society, so even now he found himself doubling over to hurl messily into an already-overflowing gutter. As he wiped his mouth off, he became aware of somebody whimpering in the nearby janitor's closet, so for protection, he partially released his Shikai and kicked the door down.

He initially went inside alert, but his face softened when he found Yachiru in there, the real Yachiru, struggling in a ball-gag. "Lieutenant!" He announced in shock, running over to her. "Who did this to you?"

She simply looked at him, continuing to struggle. She had managed to undo the ropes around her legs by kicking around, but she was still gagged and had her arms tied behind her back.

Yumichika quickly went to work, untying her arms first-which were tied pretty shoddily in the first place, and then ungagging her, which she took a deep breath in response to. "Are you okay?" He tried again, and Yachiru hugged him.

"Yun-Yun!" She giggled happily, using his actual nickname. "You saved me!"

"Who did this to you though?" He asked, scooping her up and placing her on his right shoulder.

"You sure throw up a lot, Yun-Yun!" Yachiru laughed, pointing to the mes on the front of his robes.

"So, you finally figured it out." Szayelaporro said calmly, walking into the dark closet. Yumichika quickly took a fighting stance. "You found your lieutenant, and found out I was the fake. The problem is, what will you do about it?" He grinned.

"What are you going to do to Soul Society?"

"Whatever Master Aizen wants." At this, Yumichika charged at him and slashed his robes, breaking the disguise and revealing his true form. He was still wearing a black robe, large enough to fit his figure now, but his negative spiritual pressure and overall appearance was enough to tip anybody off.

This made the Shinigami nearly back into a wall, dropping his weapon. "No...you're an Espada..." As a double-slap to the face, he doubled over and vomited again, making a sizable puddle of green bile at his feet.

"You're so attractive when you vomit. Please do it more often." Szayelaporro complimented softly, adjusting his glasses.

"What's wrong with Kenny?" Yachiru suddenly demanded from Yumichika's shoulder.

"Oh, I wouldn't worry your pretty little head off over your captain, he is fine. The rest of the Gotei 13, however, is not. They're so sick they can barely see straight, let alone fight a Hollow! Is this not an ingenious plan?" He started laughing manically, easily blocking Yumichika's charge with his hand. "Soon, your precious Soul Society will be nothing but rubble, as it should've been."

At this, Yachiru's face suddenly darkened and she jumped off Yumichika and bounced directly onto Szayelaporro's head, giving him a headache from her force.

"Don't mess with my Squad!" She threatened, glaring darkly at the Espada.

"I don't have to, the potion I slipped your captain is already doing that for me." He started laughing harder.

"Kenny!" Yachiru ran off in a panic, leaving the two effeminate men together.

"Must we fight? You clearly cannot stand. Why don't you just sit this round out?" Szayelaporro instantly mocked, making Yumichika take a fighting stance.

"Why aren't you affected by the potion?" He panted out, feeling more liquid threatening to come back up.

"Because I created it! You are always immune to your own poisons!" He laughed even harder.

Before either could make a move, however, the closet-or more like, the building it was connected to-suddenly collapsed due to a Hollow landing on it, and instantly set its sights on Yumichika.

"Ugh...I cannot fight like this!" He lamented, jumping up and layering several quick strikes on the Hollow's body.

As he did that, Szayelaporro took that moment to slip away to watch some other Soul Reaper fights, and Rangiku arrived, noticing Yumichika's need.

"Yumichika-chan!" She called out in worry, jumping up to join the fight.

"Rangiku-chan! Are you healthy enough for this?" He asked.

"Healthy enough to help a friend out!" She promised. "Besides, I learned a cool trick!"

When the Hollow made a move for her with one of its claws, she quickly lashed out with her zanpakuto, making it recoil slightly.

"Purrl, Haineko!" She commanded, but instead of the sword dissolving into ash, she quickly stuck the blade inside her mouth, gagging her. She pulled out her zanpakuto, allowing a full flood of projectile-vomit and sandy brown ash to launch out of her mouth and splatter in the Hollow's eyes, rendering it blind.

"Ick..." Yumichika stuck out his tongue.

"Isn't that cool? Some of the other Soul Reapers are trying that, combining their powers into vomit and launching the result at the Hollows! It's highly effective!" Rangiku winked. "You should try it! Plus, it seems to act as a counter-agent for the spell we're under! Once we do this, we stop hurling!"

"Sorry, but I'm too tasteful for such an act," He teased, flipping his hair. "Sorry to disappoint. Even if it _does_ cure me."

He did bring his Shikai down onto the Hollow's head, splitting it in half several times and making the monster explode.

The two dropped down to the ground and Rangiku hugged him. "Yay! We defeated a Hollow! Let's go see how our friends are doing!" She winked and ran off, and Yumichika sealed his zanpakuto and ran after her.

##############

Meanwhile, Szayelaporro was doing his best to remain hidden in the shadows, since despite wearing a black robe, his spiritual pressure alone was enough to alert anybody he was up to no good.

But he couldn't just leave, not yet. He needed to make sure his plan would succeed and not fall apart the second he left. He kept slipping in and out of the shadows, soon stopping once he felt another strong surge of energy.

He plastered himself to the wall and watched the black-haired girl stand back-to-back with a white-haired boy, nervously watching two Hollows close in on them.

Oh, _this_ should be good.

"Shiro-chan, what do we do?" Momo asked, trying to keep her cool. "We're too sick to be of much use!" As if to prove her point, she clutched her stomach and burped, nearly bringing up more bile.

"Wait...maybe we can use that to our advantage." Toshiro stated, unleashing his Bankai.

He jumped into the air and slashed at a nearby Hollow's arm with his zanpakuto, cutting off its arm.

"Shiro-chan!" Momo called after him, unable to join him in the sky.

Toshiro felt something come up and burped, then covered his mouth. "Why don't you go cool off?" He mocked, burping louder and uncovering his mouth, spraying icy vomit directly at the Hollow's face, confusing it and making it ram itself into a building and fall unconscious.

"Mix our powers with our vomit?" Momo asked in confusion. "What if it doesn't work?"

"You have to try!" Toshiro landed on the ground beside her.

"Alright!" She ducked the second Hollow's giant fanged mouth and reappeared behind it. She focused all of her energy on creating her fireballs, trying to direct the flow not to her zanpakuto, but to her mouth. Right as she felt her mouth burn with contained fire, the Hollow turned around and tried slashing at her, but she opened her mouth wide and spewed a fireball at it, burning its hand off. "How's that?" She grinned and burped loudly, spewing another fireball that burned the Hollow's other hand off.

"You did it!" Toshiro cheered, and she beamed.

Szayelaporro, on the other hand, was _not_ amused. What if Aizen found out about this?! The Shinigami were smart, but he never anticipated them learning how to weaponize their own puke!

In a panic, he ran away from that battle and looked around rapidly for someone he could take advantage of-just to show Master Aizen he was still above his game.

And there she was, almost like a miracle. The girl from the dinner, still wearing her puke-covered red dress, stumbling along, looking quite worse for the wear. Yes, she'd do just fine.

Without worrying about his current appearance, he lunged at her, grabbing her and covering her mouth with his much-larger hand so she couldn't scream. He held up both of her arms with his other hand, just so he'd have something to break if she struggled.

"Struggling is encouraged, as it'd look quite sexy on you," He whispered, making the girl's eyes widen in terror. He dragged her into a nearby outhouse and shut the door, then let go of her. "Master Aizen won't be very pleased once he finds out my plan failed, but he'll be more forgiving if I bring back a hostage, and a noble-lady Soul Reaper is good enough!" He explained, adjusting his glasses.

If Rukia had a response to that, and she most certainly did, she couldn't give it at the moment due to her head practically being buried inside the toilet hole, spewing out her guts.

"Quite sexy," Szayelaporro encouraged her, making Rukia glance over at him with a very dirty look. Vomit was encrusted around her mouth like some sort of lipstick.

"You'll never have me as a prisoner...!" She rejected defiantly, plunging her head back into the toilet hole.

"I'd suggest we duel for it, but seeing your current state, that'd almost be unfair." He grinned, and Rukia grinned back weakly.

"I can beat you...!"

"Want to prove it?"

"You are only an 8th-level Espada, I'm not scared of you!" She declared, wiping her mouth off and taking a fighting stance.

"You should be..." Szayelaporro threatened before pulling out his sword. Rukia stuck out her hand and prepared to do a knock-out spell on him, but he suddenly relaxed his stance, and she did as well, surprised. "It's too cramped in here. Why don't we take this outside?"

Before Rukia could ask him what he meant, he blew both the roof and walls off the outhouse, making several Soul Reapers nearby run away in terror before they got hit by something.

"Much better," Szayelaporro sighed before charging at Rukia with his sword.

She responded by jumping into the air and doing a flip over the 8th Espada, landing on her feet behind him. "Shakohou!" She yelled, firing a blast of red energy out of her hand and hitting him hard in the back, making him stumble.

"Magic, hm? So you can do magic?" He asked in a trivial way, as if he was studying a specimen. "Master Aizen would enjoy someone like that. We Espada don't have abilities like that, so the chance to study something so...rare... _that'd_ be a true treat." He licked his lips in perverse anticipation, and Rukia's eyes widened in both disgust and fear.

"Why'd I not bring my sword?" She lamented to herself, firing another energy ball at Szayelaporro.

"Unprepared, are we? Don't worry, I'll make sure this fight is as enjoyable for you as it is for me." He charged at her with his sword and actually managed to nick her cheek with the hilt, drawing fresh blood.

The smell wasn't what made her squeamish, of course, since she had been vomiting all afternoon long, but yet somehow that scent and sight tipped her stomach off the edge. She clutched her throat as she burped softly, then doubled-over as she vomited up more green bile. Did she even have any bile left to vomit? Her stomach and small intestine both had been emptied out ages ago, it was only a matter of time before her liver followed.

"You get squeamish at the sight of blood? How interesting," Szayelaporro noted, still studying what she was capable of. He was circling her like a vulture now, but she refused to let her intimation show.

"In your dreams!" She mocked, jumping into the air and flipping, landing a kick right on Szayelaporro's face with her shoe. As she landed again, she had the sudden wish to have been wearing heels instead of flats.

The 8th Espada was not prepared for that attack and fell over, hitting the ground hard. Rukia looked back at him with a smirk on her face, which made his irritation boil over the edge.

"Fine. You want to fight dirty?" He threatened, slowly standing up. "I am the king of fighting dirty. You want to go, then we'll go."

Rukia simply looked at him in horror, wondering what he could possibly be thinking of doing.

"Sip, Fornicaras." He commanded, sticking his zanpakuto down his throat and practically deep-throating it. The sight alone made Rukia's cheeks bulge, but she managed to keep her vile vomit down this time.

Szayelaporro soon pulled out his zanpakuto from his mouth and transformed into his final form, that of a pink fairy-butterfly thingie. "Do you think you can defeat me now, as beautiful as I am?" He flipped his hair with a grin. "I will make sure Master Aizen gives you a pretty cell back at Las Noches."

"I don't have to fight you," Rukia noticed.

"Exactly. Just take my hand-!" He offered it to her, but she glared at him.

"I know enough about your kind that once your final form is unlocked, you cannot hide your spiritual pressure anymore. I don't have to do anything because in just a few minutes, hordes of Soul Reapers will appear to throw you out!" He threw a tentacle her way, and she jumped out of its path.

"True, but who can stand up properly currently? Did you take me for a fool? I planned out every single second of this whole plan. You, my dear, just happened to be a last minute inclusion." He put a hand to his mouth and tittered.

"Then I'll just fight you on my own!" She fired another energy beam at him, but he simply whacked it back at her using his hand, resulting in her being pushed back into a building.

"I am stronger than you are, pitiful Soul Reaper! Besides, what chance do you stand without your sword?" Szayelaporro advanced towards her slowly and calmly.

"I have my agility!" She reminded him in a weak voice, standing up and wobbling.

"But I have this!" He grinned sadistically and wrapped a tentacle tightly around Rukia, lifting her off the ground and holding her upside down, making her dress flip up. Since she was back in the traditional Soul Society, her underwear had a more traditional look to it: knee-long white pantaloons trimmed with pink ribbon and lace. She simply struggled to get free, but that just made his grip around her tighter. "Struggling makes the process take longer!" He cautioned with a grin.

"What...are...you...doing...?" She gasped, only to get released a second later. She hit the ground hard and found only enough strength to pull herself onto her knees.

"Taking advantage of my assets," He licked his lips once more and out dropped a small doll from one of his tentacles. He held it out to her and revealed it was a smaller, cuter doll version of her-and it made her shudder as she pictured what he would do with it.

"What are you going to do with that?" She asked weakly, clutching her throat again.

Szayelaporro stared at the doll and considered his options. Master Aizen wouldn't want a broken girl, so anything involving bones or muscles were out of the question. She had already vomited up half of her weight, so vomiting would be pointless too. But then again, he was in control here, was he not? If he caused any permanent damage, he'd simply reverse it on the doll.

And with that mindset, he tightly clutched the doll and pulled its right leg back, bending it. Rukia's eyes suddenly grew wide as she felt the bones in her own right leg snap-rendering it broken. "Is that voodoo?" She demanded, but she only got a sadistic grin in response.

"Anything that happens to this doll, happens to you, my dear!" He opened up the doll to reveal several tiny plastic organs inside, all labeled in Spanish. He tapped his purple-painted lips in contemplation, eyeing each and every available organ to see which ones would do the most damage-without killing her, of course. Finally, he found one, and pulled it out, grinning more at her.

"No...don't you dare!" Rukia yelled in fear, slowly pulling herself up and swaying badly on her broken leg, which had bent at an odd angle. Anyone with a basic knowledge of human anatomy would know his tiny organs roughly resembled the actual organ in the body, and after looking closer, her eyes widened even more when she saw he pulled out a bladder.

"Yes, I will dare!" Szayelaporro laughed maniacally, twirling the selected organ inbetween his long fingernails. She started to form a massive energy burst with her remaining energy, but right before she could unleash it, Szayelaporro crushed the bladder inbetween his long fingernails, making Rukia's eyes widen in both pain and shock. "You know full well which organ I selected, don't look so surprised!"

"You...bastard..." She managed, a thick stream of yellowed urine dripping down her legs and forming a small puddle at her feet.

"You'll make such a nice prisoner, and an interesting test specimen too," He smiled sweetly, that smile being the last thing Rukia saw before she lost consciousness.

"Rukia-chan!" A female voice yelled in worry, and Szayelaporro swore to himself. Of course this girl would have friends.

The voice soon revealed itself to be Rangiku, with Yumichika, Toshiro, and Momo in tow, having finished their respective fights a while ago.

"What did you do to her?" Momo demanded instantly, running over to her. "Her leg's broken!"

"The better question is, how did an Arrancar even get in here?" Toshiro wondered in a cold tone.

"I've been here this whole time, you just are too pitiful to sense my spiritual energy!" Szayelaporro laughed, flipping his hair.

"You're the one behind the sudden epidemic of vomiting!" Rangiku announced suddenly, taking a fighting stance.

"Of course, and wasn't that delightful? But my plan had a flaw; you learned how to fight with your vomit, and now all my beloved Hollows are gone! So to prevent Master Aizen from punishing me, I was going to give him a prisoner!" He explained, motioning to Rukia's lifeless body.

"Momo-chan, get Rukia-chan out of here and to the infirmary! We'll deal with him," Rangiku said in a serious tone.

Momo nodded and shook Rukia lightly, making her stir. "Hmmm?"

"Rukia-chan, you have to get away from here! I'll take you to Squad 4 for medical help!" She explained quickly, helping Rukia up to her feet.

"My leg's broken..." Rukia mumbled, falling into Momo.

"I know! Just shift your weight onto your other leg, you'll be fine!" She coaxed, holding Rukia close to her body and slowly retreating with her in tow.

"Just leave it to us to take care of this freak!" Yumichika grinned, partially releasing his Shikai.

"You three cannot possibly believe you stand a chance against someone like me?" Szayelaporro asked in curiosity. "You would have to be insane!"

"Our systems are purged, so now we can fight you as long as we want!" Toshiro stated, already in his Bankai state.

"Then you underestimate my power level."

"We're stronger levels than Rukia-chan is, we can handle you!" Rangiku smirked.

"Fine, but I have tricks your silly little Shinigami minds can barely even begin to process." He grinned sadistically and squirted purple goo out onto the three of them, making them groan in disgust.

Just as soon as they were sprayed, five clones of themselves were torn from their bodies and surrounded them on all sides.

"Cloning? That's your big attack? Child's play!" Toshiro mocked, easily slicing through four of his clones, only to have them replaced with eight more.

"Is it really child's play?"

"Watch, we'll beat you easy! Then you'll be forced to leave Soul Society alone!" Rangiku threatened, chopping five of her clones.

"A challenge? Very well then. If you three somehow manage to beat me, then I will willingly undo my hold on your stomachs and leave. However, if I happen to win, which I will, I will take all three of you back with me as my prisoners! A cold-bloodied captain, a narcissistic femboy, and a big-busted blonde. All will prove to be useful to Master Aizen. And his helpers," He added, making Rangiku's eyes widen.

"Gin..." She whispered under her breath, resulting in her concentration being broken and getting her chest slashed by one of her clones.

"Rangiku-chan!" Yumichika gasped in worry, cutting down several of his clones and running over to her.

"Stop with the distractions and fight us for real! Or are you just scared of losing?" Toshiro mocked, making Szayelaporro glare at him in annoyance.

"Want to see me fight?" He waved his hand in front of his face and all of the clones vanished, then he lashed out at the three with his tentacles, tightly wrapping them up and squeezing them.

"Stop! My chest will pop!" Rangiku announced, struggling to break free of his grasp.

Toshiro simply blew his ice breath onto the tentacle he was in and shattered it with his fists, rendering him free.

However, he still had enough nutrients absorbed from his body that when Szayelaporro released his grip on the other two, three dolls popped out.

"What are you going to do with those?" Toshiro demanded.

"The same thing I did to your noble-lady friend, and we all saw the great condition she was in!" He held out Rangiku's first, showing off a cutely-designed doll.

"Stop it!" She cried, charging at him and kicking the doll out of his hands. As her doll hit the ground, however, she felt an intense pain in her back and lowered herself to the ground to nurse it.

"No matter, I can still work with you two!" Szayelaporro pulled out Yumichika's doll and grabbed the arm holding his Shikai, making Yumichika's eyes widen and start to charge at him as well.

Right as he raised his blade to make a strike, however, the 8th Espada snapped the doll's arm, making every bone in Yumichika's arm break.

"What?!" His face turned green in pain, but he remained in his fighting stance, waiting for an easy opening.

"There goes two Soul Reapers," Szayelaporro counted, poking the doll's eyes and making Yumichika fall from the sky as he clutched his own eyes in pain. "Which just leaves you," He giggled, pulling out Toshiro's little doll.

"Don't..." His eyes widened and he beat his ice wings hard, preparing to charge.

"What should I do to you I haven't already done to the others? Hmmm..." He thought about it, tapping his mouth with his painted nails.

"Don't!" Toshiro yelled, preparing to breath his ice breath onto the Espada.

However, before any of them could make a move, a slit in the sky opened up beside them and out stepped none other than Sosuke Aizen.

"Aizen! So this was your plan all along? I should've known..." Toshiro yelled at him.

"Number 8, you have failed in your plan. Please return with me back to Las Noches. Your punishment will be given to you there." Sosuke directed calmly, ignoring the white-haired Soul Reaper.

"Master Aizen!" Szayelaporro said in surprise, bowing. "I was just getting ready to bring back a prisoner for you!"

"Your service is no longer required here. Return at once or your punishment will be even greater."

"Yes." Szayelaporro obeyed, reluctantly putting away his dolls and reverting back to his regular form. He then followed Sosuke through the portal back to Hueco Mundo, leaving the very confused and messy Soul Society behind him.

#####

Rukia woke up in Squad 4's infirmary, a bit dazed but still remembering the events that brought her there. Several Soul Reapers buzzed about her room, cleaning up what was presumably vomit from the floor. Her dress was no longer on her, but instead of wearing a white under-kimono like she should've, she was instead wearing old-fashioned Western-style underwear: a knee-length chemise with green trim, ankle-length pantaloons with green ribbon trim, and lacy white stockings.

Momo, who was sitting in a chair beside her bed, noticed she was awake and ran over to her. "Are you okay, Rukia-chan?" She asked in a worried tone, but Rukia reassured her with a smile. "The Espada is gone, and everyone seems to be fine...nobody's uncontrollably puking anymore!"

"That's good. I suppose that means that Espada had something to do with it," Rukia stated, throwing off her covers to reveal her leg was in a sling.

"Your brother visited you earlier and gave you those to wear, and took your old dress and drawers back to his manor to clean," Momo explained, referring to Rukia's new undergarments.

"Strange how he didn't bring me back a new dress." Rukia said simply. She slowly swung her legs off the bed, then got up, wobbling slightly.

"Come on, let's take you back to your brother's. You need to recover fully before you can return to Earth!" Momo ran ahead of her, but stopped at the doorway, waiting for Rukia to catch up.

"I know a certain someone who isn't going to be happy about this," She mused.

The two left the room Rukia was staying in, although Momo noticed the slightly-younger Soul Reaper was uncomfortable in her current dress, so she started looking around for something else she could wear.

She noticed Isane wandering around and quickly ran up to her, asking if they had any spare nurse's uniforms laying around.

"Hm? Why would you need something like that?" She wondered in response.

"Rukia-chan wants one!" Came her bright response.

"I'll have to look," Isane stated, then quickly left the room to look.

A few minutes later, she returned, holding up a short pink nurse's dress. It resembled the ones found on Earth, coming complete with short pink heels, lacy white gloves, and a pink hat. "Will this do?"

"Yes, it'll work for now," Rukia answered, taking the dress from Isane and vanishing into her room to change in peace.

She emerged a few minutes later, wearing the pink dress and short heels, the dress only reaching her knees so it did little to hide her lacy pantaloons.

The two girls left Squad 4 and found almost every single Soul Reaper running around busily outside, doing everything they could to clean up the large piles of puke that had amassed in both gutters and outhouses alike. Even Squad 11 was helping, including Yachiru, although she seemed more focused on telling her beloved captain everything that had happened to her.

"I was locked in a closet, Kenny! I had a gag in my mouth! But Yun-Yun saved me!" She was explaining in a serious yet excited tone.

"Rukia-chan!" Rangiku and Yumichika both ran up to her happily, wearing clean robes.

"You look so much better now!" Rangiku gushed.

"That fight today has proven to us that our security needs to be improved drastically to prevent outside threats from coming inside." Byakuya stated calmly, coming in out of nowhere.

"I couldn't agree more, Big Brother!" Rukia got stars in her eyes, and Byakuya stared at her strange outfit.

"Speaking of which, who was that guy, anyway? I've never seen him before in my life!" Yumichika stated.

"Whoever he was, I get the feeling we haven't seen the last of him," Rangiku commented darkly.

##############

Meanwhile, Sosuke had called for all of his Espada to gather in his throne room, and despite their confusion, they did so, bowing as soon as he entered. The only one who didn't bow was Szaelaporro, who entered shortly after Sosuke did and bowed in front of the throne instead of a numerically-ordered line like everyone else.

"Number 8, I gave you a task to carry out and warned you that if you failed, you would have to deal with harsh consequences. You failed, and now I must carry out my promised punishment. I will do this in front of your siblings, so they may see what happens if they fail me in the future." He started calmly.

"This wasn't my fault though, how was I supposed to know the Shinigami would learn how to attack with their own vomit?" Szayelaporro instantly protested.

"Silence. Your punishment is banishment from both Las Noches and the Espada until further notice. Leave at once. I have no more use for you."

Szayelaporro stood up and looked around to see if any of the others were taking amusement from his banishment, although most were either looking down out of politeness or looking away out of disinterest. Only one was really taking an interest, and it was the last person Szayelaporro wanted to communicate with.

"What do you know, second time's the charm, eh? I ain't saving your ass this time around though! You wanna take one of these guys out, you're doing it alone!" Nnoitra mocked.

"Master Aizen, what shall you do now? Will you demote or promote the current Espada, or bring someone new in?" Ulquiorra asked.

"It is none of your concern, Number 4. I am left without an 8th position either way, and I will not go out in the wilderness searching for a new one." Sosuke glanced over at Szayelaporro. "Are you still here? I suppose I'll have to remove you by force. Numbers 3 and 5, dispose of him."

"Gladly!" Nnoitra grinned, chasing after Szayelaporro, who bolted. Halibel placed her fingers inside her zanpakuto's rings, but didn't remove it from its sheath, and ran after Szayelaporro as well, and soon the two surrounded him. They both gripped his arms tightly to prevent him from running away, and started dragging him through the halls of Las Noches, ignoring the stares of confused servants.

"We're going to throw you off the tallest tower here, doesn't that ring a few bells?" Nnoitra continued.

"I am sorry, Master Aizen required me to do this," Was Halibel's only response to the whole thing, and Szayelaporro knew that was as close to an actual apology as he'd get from her, so he figured he'd accept it.

The two continued to drag him along, soon climbing up an impossibly tall and steep set of winding stairs, soon reaching a tall tower. The actual inside of the tower wasn't used for anything, not even for storage, and the blindingly white room remained empty. Halibel released her grip and stood in front of the door, her fingers intertwined in her sword's rings just in case he tried to run.

"Have fun out there! Say hi to some of the other expelled Espada for me, will ya? Or better yet, get eaten by 'em!" Nnoitra said gleefully, releasing his grip on Szayelaporro and shoving him towards the window, making him lose his balance and nearly fall out of the window.

When he hesitated, Nnoitra gave him another, harder shove, and that did the trick, as the former 8th Espada lost his balance and fell out of the window, plummeting to the ground below. The fall's force and speed was enough to knock him out, and as if to add a final insult, Nnoitra spit out of the window onto him and slammed it shut so he couldn't find a way back in.

"Well, that's over with!" He rubbed his hands together as if he disposed of something unclean, and left the room, shoving Halibel out of his way. She gave him a glare in response and followed him, wanting to see what Sosuke thought of a job well done.

################

When Szayelaporro came to, he was amazed he hadn't been eaten or carried off to the lair of some lesser-Hollow, and considered himself lucky for that. Then again, what lesser Hollows even hung around Las Noches in the first place unless they wanted to get attacked or eaten? He stood up and adjusted his glasses, then wiped the white sand off his clothes. He smirked to himself as he already plotted ways to take his position back, and half involved going after his previous brethren, and throwing _them_ out.

He recalled Nnoitra's comment about the other expelled Espada, and his eyes widened when he implied there might be more than one out there. He wondered if any of them wanted their rank back, and figured if he was persuasive enough, they'd join his side and help him bring down the current Espada.

Szayelaporro grinned at his own idea and cracked his knuckles, then adjusted his glasses once more. If Master Aizen thought he could kick him out, he was sadly mistaken. Soon, the 8th Espada would be back to reclaim his title, and this time, he'd bring an army...


End file.
